No clowns, no mimes, no exceptions
U.S. Post Office
Zip's Postal Shipping 101
Zanysite.Com
Tabletop Role-Playing Games
Sci-Fi/Fantasy
The Paranormal
Professional Wrestling
PHP Coding
80's Music
Sketching, drawing
Adventure Gamebooks
Bad movies, music etc.
Amanda Blake (Miss Kitty)
"King" Harley Race (wrestler)
E-mail from Gary Gygax
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BY THE HAMMER OF THOR, I REPRESENT ALL THAT IS DEVINE AND GOOD IN THE UNIVERSE. I AM A TOP 6,000 REVIEWER, HAVE A 100% FEEDBACK RATING AND WILL PERSONALLY MAKE SURE THAT YOUR SHIP WILL SAIL IN GOOD COASTAL WATERS WITH A BRISK WIND AT YOUR BACK PROVIDED YOU SWEAR ALLEGIANCE TO WARRIOR NATIONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN
I was born a poor black child to Chinese parents in Antarctica. The winters were harsh but we had each other, and the dogs, to keep us warm, as we subsisted on a diet of whale blubber, Pixie Stix and Vienna sausages.
My family eventually migrated to northeastern Oklahoma via the Panama Canal, which at that time ran through Antarctica. A roving pack of rabid clowns were terrorizing the area at this time and while defending myself and my Mom, my Dad fell to the greasepainted horrors, but not before passing on his mystical Clown-Fighting skills to me.
I was in and out of school, hiring out my mercenary services to track down and bring Clowns and Mimes to justice (as Oklahoma authorities could neither find nor hire the infamous A-Team), and I eventually got my G.E.D. from a small local community college, in order to meet the minimum educational rquirements to join the "Fightin' Entertainers" travelling minstrel group, consisting of Singing Cowboys, Jingle Cats trainers and Garth Brooks impersonators, guided by our noble leader and road agent, Tony Randall.
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Things I Have Learned from eBay |
"Whatever" is an entirely acceptable one-word response and reason to give a Negative Feedback to a seller - explanations are overrated.
Ask for feedback and critiques and advice from the Community forums ONLY if you're prepared to have them answer you, as well as go over every bit of your information and all your sales and ALSO give you detailed critiques of where you have gone horribly wrong on those TOO - its like a mandatory full-service critque service. But I appreciate all of it. =)
Money orders that sellers and buyers use should ONLY be USPS money orders, which can be cashed on the spot by the Post Office and don't have to be deposited in a bank account and aren't counterfeited like "junk money orders" from grocery stores - unless the "junk money orders" can be cashed similarly and don't have to be deposited in a bank, in which case they're every bit as good as USPS money orders, which can also be counterfeited - depending on which bank and postal clerk you ask, in which state. Yes, its a very hotbutton issue, apparently.
Charging $30.00 for shipping of a $ .99 item is unethical and blatant "fee avoidance", but so many people have done it, it just wouldn't be right not to do it at least once, just to say you've flirted with the Dark Side. I haven't, but it does appear to be the "thing to do". Who wants to buy a pencil? Contact me off-site and we'll work something out!
Buy It Now and Reserve Price are synonymous with "Sunuva, I ain't biddin' on THAT!"
Sniping is a well-loved and cherished eBay past-time.
Turbo Lister is FREE, no matter how surprising that is considering eBay charges money for tiny things like Bold.
Math is hard.
Domestic and International Postal Zone Codes and Shipping Rates are like having an army of Sharks With Laser Beams on Their Heads - if you can understand and wield them properly, you are nearly all-powerful, but miscalculate badly enough and it could all be over.
As a Buyer, always, ALWAYS check out the shipping costs - DOUBLY so if the item is not from your country - ASK QUESTIONS FIRST BEFORE BIDDING. Have this tattooed on the backs of your hands if necessary.
Gigantic pictures of spaceships and trees provide the perfect backdrop to sell technical manuals, dice and dishes.
People who buy Lucille Ball Memorabilia, Japanese Anime DVDs, Medieval Swords and Bulk Vaseline probably have something in that "Private Auction", the nature of which you'd be better off not knowing.
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Had to include the phrase "sorry about any hairs, my cat helped me pack the box" in an invoice to a buyer - don't plan on having to repeat that.
Ordered 240 dice really cheap from Australia, thinking the $4 shipping on the seller's page applied to me, even though I compiled my own international shipping chart not a week before and KNOW shipping isn't anywhere near that cheap - the "cheap" dice may wind up costing me $6 each.
Have responded promptly and reasonably to questions from bidders from outside the U.S. but forgot to remove the "BLOCK bidders from outside the US" from my preferences. Oops!
Bought bubble wrap from the Post Office for $3 which is available at the local dollar store for $1 because I hadn't read Zip's page about the Post Office intentionally overpricing their supplies in order to avoid cutting into retailer's sales.
So far, have undercalculated shipping by over $2 twice and sold at least five items which, after fees and other costs, equated to me giving them away.
Woke up with a "perfect" formula in my head for figuring shipping costs for domestic and a "multiplier" to apply to international rates. Turns out Excel disagreed pretty strongly with my sleep-borne theory.
Corrected the Post Office clerk on the price of flat rate Priority shipping. Not sure if it was more pitiful that she was wrong or that I knew it.
Have been told by the Post Office workers at least four times now that "we are getting digital scales in!" because of the "eBay Whore" stamp on my forehead that only they can see.
Have talked more to the Post Office workers and eBay buyers the past two weeks than I've talked to my friends in the past month.
Last night my cat told me, "Seriously man, get a grip". But then he turned into a giant purple whale and swam down the stream that was running through the underground tunnel in my kitchen, so I might have been dreaming that.
The Post Office Workers (POW) keep telling me that "you customers can get boxes and sizes that we can't get". I finally figured out where the boxes were listed on the USPS website and my eyes lit up like a kid on Christmas morning at the 4 pages of different sizes boxes, all free - I ordered 75 boxes - my friend ordered 250 - the carriers are going to love us.
I went in the other day to mail an item in the $7.70 flat rate Priority mail box and the POW told me, "You'll be better off sending it Priority by weight instead of in this flat rate box, it will cost a lot less". I told her I didn't have another box to put a Priority mail tag on, and she said "No, I mean the other Priority mail box", which confused me since up until now I had only seen one VHS tape box, one flat rate envelope and the two flat rate $7.70 boxes. I told her I didn't have whatever other box she was talking about, and she said "Well I'll GIVE you one" and went and got a Priority mail box which I didn't even know existed. I came away feeling betrayed, like they had been keeping a secret from me for months, since I had sent plenty of stuff before using Priority mail and they had never told me or shown me this "other" non-flat-rate Priority box. Heh.
I said to the POW, "You keep telling me there are boxes you all can't get, that I can, which seems odd to me, seeing as how you're the Post Office and these boxes are USPS boxes and are free. Can't you just go home and order them and bring them to work with you?!", to which the lady responded with a strange wan smile, "I don't have a computer". So apparently everyone that works at the Post Office is sans PC and there are no forms in existance that lets postal workers order boxes except the "standard Post Office boxes". I asked, "Do you want me to BRING you some of the boxes I'm ordering, so you'll have them?!" She smiled and said "YES! That would be great, we have some people that do that; we always appreciate that!" I'm still shaking my head in confusion over this whole mysterious issue where the Post Offices are prohibited from ordering Post Office boxes for their Post Office - am I missing something?!
Got to listen to one of the carriers talking to the clerks, as he read from the newspaper. "Local Letter Carriers Ask Community to Help Prevent Animal Attacks... hmm. I didn't ask anyone to do that. Did any of you ask anyone to do that?" They all got into it, it was like some sort of abstractionist Seinfeld routine, which was sort of amusing, but then I realized "Well, if none of them DID ask that... who put that in the paper?" But then they started talking about who had eaten carp and mountain oysters and such and I decided I was ready to go.
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